population: 1
it's been a good two weeks since i've blogged, and perhaps this entry will explain a little of why. as of late, i've been finding myself retreating more and more into my own little world, preoccupied with my own mini-dramas, and well hiding more and more in my schoolwork. i can't precisely pinpoint as to why i've taken on this defense mechanism/retreat strategy, but over the past two weeks or so, i've been quite the self-absorbed and self-involved. while others may argue that well, everyone needs time to themselves and everyone needs their space, i think there are times that i use this excuse all too conveniently... and in light of the school year winding down and projects piling on, i've been able to justify this retreat into my tiny little corner of the world, my hermit/design bubble as i like to call it, and just avoid all the other issues going on in life.
as a result i've lost sight of those around me, the goings on in their lives and the responsibility that's been entrusted to me by God to consider others better than myself, be involved in the lives of others, and to take care of those He has blessed me with. to those of you whose lives i've kinda missed out on, i sincerely apologize and i promise to try harder.
what's funny is that despite my retreating tendencies, the people with whom i have been blessed (sometimes the ones that i kinda run away from) with continue to poke and prod at my world, trying to get into it, pursuing me, and being concerned. while i am completely undeserving in light of the explanation i gave above about my self-absorption, these people pursue me endlessly, refusing to let me dwell in my hermit/design bubble. and i know that i've gotten into the unhealthy phase of the school year in which i stay up till who knows when working on projects and what not, not eating all that often due to a lack of time, and isolating myself from others... and i know that i've sent a bunch of you who read this into a world of worry over me and well to those of you who refuse to let me dwell in my own little world apart from everyone else, and who continue to worry and care about me... i thank you, and i pray that i can be a blessing to you too (and i'll try to be healthier :P )
and well here's the clincher... i've been meaning to blog about this for quite some time now, but well involving myself in nothing more than me and the goings-on of my world, i haven't... until well, now... and that's cuz of what hit me this morning while reading the good ol' Bible...
haggai 1:4-5
(n.b. "this house" refers to God's temple which was still lying in ruins at the time of haggai, after the Israelites returned from being exiled to Bablyon) .
... talk about humbling. being so involved in my own "house", i've come to neglect the priorities God has set before me through the people He has placed in my life... think it's time to re-commit & re-focus, as difficult as it may be to face life, think it's what God calls us to do, as we aren't given a spirit of timidity, but one of power.